I feel embarrassed just typing this, but today I cried at work. Not just a few tears but the kind of crying I’m known for in my family – a deep sob that causes me to have trouble catching my breath. Even worse, I let it happen in front of my boss.
There’s no need to go into specifics but on top of dealing with my day-to-day depression I’ve been experiencing today I got burned my a colleague. It caught me off guard and I couldn’t control myself. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes and I tried to fight them back. I was doing a great job until my boss called me into his office.
We were about to have a conversation, completely unrelated to my issues, when it happened. I turned around to shut the door and I completely broke down.
I’m embarrassed and ashamed. I feel silly and ridiculous. I feel small and weak.
But I feel oddly supported. My boss didn’t flinch. He asked questions. He let me cry it out. When I posted my embarrassment on Instagram I received so many positive responses I never expected to receive, and even a message from someone who admitted they cry at work frequently. Even more so, I feel so much better after that cry. A sort-of weird catharsis.
I don’t want to speak too soon but I wonder if my mental health might be taking a turn for the better.